Attn: Stony Brook students!

This is to clarify any confusion about my socialization at the massive yet warm university. No, I'm not a serial killer or psychopath (as one girl said I looked like on orientation day). No, I'm not submissively cute and innocent (sorry all you raging Asian fetishists). I apologize if I seem unapproachable at school, I'm actually pretty nice most of the time. So say hi, ask me the time, comment on the quality of my English. Thanks.

Always yours, the one and only.